Tuesday, September 14, 2010

I Hate Ponies. Reason #1

Minnow, you're not even looking at the canvas!

Ummm...so, I just found out that this pony's "paintings" go for about $100 each on paintingpony.com. This doesn't seem fair. My elementary school art teacher told me that I definitely should not under any circumstances attempt to pursue art in any way or form. Ever. True, I could only draw cartoon cat heads, but I think with the right market I could have taken them far, given some encouragement. Anyway, so my cat heads are worthless, and yet this PONY chomps down on a paintbrush and rubs his face against a canvas, and suddenly he's an artist capable of "masterpieces?"

Sorry, Minnow, maybe I'm just jealous, but I am extremely skeptical of your love, dedication, and basic ability when it comes to painting.

Minnow the pony: Artist or Imposter?

1 comment:

  1. This is Becca:

    I think it's obvious Minnow knows exactly what she's doing, because it's pretty clear that the pictured painting is a snow-covered branch saturated in brilliant, winter sunlight.

    Even as its perfectly rendered portrayal makes me shiver with cold in summer, my heart melts at the feeling painted into each swirl of bark, each individual snowflake.

    While she may not have to dream of greener pastures, she obviously has a knack for understanding all types of climes, thus, as any good Artist, not limiting what types of works she can produce.

    And she obviously is dedicated; the dyed streaks in her hair show that she's carried her art onto her "person" so that the outside mirrors the inside.

    Dearest sister, it is time for you to let your own experiences go, lest you again mistakenly transfer your fear and anger unto others in the form of bullying and defamation.

    Besides, it's not your teacher's fault that the cartoon cat head market is severely over-saturated and in no need of new prodigies.

    I am curious what other reasons there are that ponies command your ire.